A month ago, I made the following complaint on Facebook: “WEDDING VENT: Picking a date for a Chinese wedding is 100x harder. Many more ‘bad luck’ days to avoid & fierce competition for ‘lucky’ days.” While I knew wedding planning would be difficult, as if it were a fierce battle (like Braveheart fierce) and that we would need to move quickly (like lighting fast ninjas), I never thought I’d lose sleep over the details.
Originally, we wanted a Spring wedding – as in sometime between March and May of next year. Unfortunately, DL is going back to school. This means that a Spring wedding could potentially push him to the edge of darkness since he’ll be in the middle of midterms and finals during crunch time. So for his sake, we decided on a June wedding….I know, how cliché.
Finding An Auspicious Day
Looking at all the available Saturdays on the June 2011 calendar, we quickly realized that there were only three viable dates – 6/11, 6/18 and 6/25. Three, you say? But wait, isn’t there another Saturday in June? To which I say, yes there is, but it’s an unlucky number.
Unlucky? What do you mean unlucky? Well, 4 in Chinese sounds like the word for “death” or “to die.” In other words, getting married on the 4th of any month would be like getting married on Friday the 13th. It’s superstitious and I shouldn’t care, but I’m really not game for having multiple conversations to explain why I’m getting married on an unlucky day.
Conversely, 6/18 would have been an ideal date. In fact, it was our ideal date. Why is that? Well, 6 sounds the word for “road,” 1 is just “one” and 8 sounds like the phrase for “wealth.” To spell it out even further, 6/18 sounds like “one road to wealth” or “fortune all the way.” Unfortunately, we weren’t the only Chinese couple to figure that one out. Needless to say, I wasn’t surprised when I found out 6/18 was already booked at our #1 Chinese restaurant candidate several months ago.
With only two options in June, we decided to consider dates in July as well. The best day would have been 7/16, which also has good numbers that imply to fortune and prosperity. Not surprisingly, this date had also been booked. At one point, I wanted to have the wedding on a Sunday to get a good number and save money, but my mom immediately shot me down when I suggested it.
[Side Note: If anyone is in the market for an auspicious wedding day according to the Chinese lunar calendar, this website was the best resource by far.]
Flip A Coin – June or July
To avoid pushing out this wedding even further into August and September, we thought long and hard about our remaining options in June and July. We had six options. Some of them worked with the ceremony venue that we were considering at the time, some of them didn’t. It basically boiled down to whether or not we should host our little shindig on a regular weekend or on a holiday weekend (i.e., Fourth of July weekend).
For that holiday weekend, we weighed the pros (theoretically, guests wouldn’t need to take PTO to attend and number-wise it’s a good date as it sounds like “life will be easy”) and the cons (what if guests have other travel plans, like my cousin who’ll be celebrating her first wedding anniversary that weekend next year). Being wary of stealing people’s thunder, I consulted said cousin who graciously told me to go ahead as “[she had] no universal stamp on [that weekend]” and would come to my wedding as long as she got an invitation. With that, we decided to get married next year on July 2 and proceeded to make a mad dash like crazy people to put down deposits on our venues.
…To Be Continued….